Seoul Sista

Ok, this is a rant that has been building for a while. Since September 2nd, to be precise. That was the first day of school, therefore the beginning of my daily commute to and from Pickering.  From where I live in Toronto to where I work in Durham is about a 25-minute drive on the 401. That's pretty sweet as far as commutes go.  I pop in a cd (the morning radio hosts drive me BONKERS, so I refuse to listen to them), and sing my way to work every morning.  By 4pm, all I want is a break from the noise (I teach Grade 5/6 - enough said!), so my drive home is usually quiet. 

 

If it weren't for one thing, my daily drives would actually be something to look forward to.  That one thing? That pet peeve that is growing and festering?

 

 

Every frustrating experience I have had on the road since going back to work has involved someone who is driving and chatting away on their cell.

 

Let's see, there are the people who can't find their gas pedal when they are talking on the phone, so I'm stuck going 35 km/h while the person in front of me talks business or catches up on girly gossip (like, oh-my-God!).  Or stuck behind a slow poke in the fast lane of the 401 because they are so wrapped up in their conversation that they don't notice all the people passing them in the middle lane. Or the folks who are so focused on their conversation that they realize too late that their turn is upon them, so they slam on the brakes when they are almost past their street.  And you have to love the people who can't turn to check their blind spots because they are holding their phone to their ear, so they just glide into your lane, leaving you to slam on your brakes (and swear and honk of course). 

 

I love my cell phone. I love sending and receiving text messages, and I love shooting the shit with my family and friends. I can't say that I have never talked on the phone while driving -  I know I have on many occasions. But since becoming so painfully aware of the driving behaviours that cell-phones produce, I simply refuse to answer my phone while I'm in the driver's seat now. You become a lazier, less focused driver, and that means an unsafe driver.

 

So please, do yourself and everyone else on the road a favour and save the chatting for when you are not behind the wheel. My sanity can't take much more! (Remember - I teach Grade 5/6 - enough said!)   :)

Ever loved something with your whole heart and then given it up for some reason or other? Like, maybe you adore chocolate and you gave it up for Lent one year? Well, when I made the decision to give vegan eating a fair shot, I had to give up cheese. Cheese is my thing. I didn't have to know anyone at a party - as long as there was a cheese platter, I was good. A crappy day was always made better by a cheese pizza. Offer me havarti and I'd love you forever. Giving it up broke my heart a little. Ok, a lot.

 

I can say with pride that I was a devoted vegan for 6 strong weeks. And you know what? I had never felt better! I can't really explain it except to say that my insides just felt 'right'.

 

But then I allowed myself a Cheeto - you know, the really crunchy kind? And from there, it was all downhill.

 

Now - this does not mean that I abandoned my vegan efforts fully. Not at all. What it means is that I became very devoted to finding alternatives that would enable me to enjoy cheese again (the real stuff, not the vile soy version) while knowing that I was not contributing to any form of animal mistreatment.

 

And you know what? I found it! I found the alternative!

 

I had been having my hair cut by my uber-gay, super-fabulous stylist, Blake, and we were talking about veganism. He is also a vegan. Our conversation went something like this:

 

Me: I don't know how much longer I can hold out, Blake. The cheese is calling to me.

 

Blake: Oh my god sweetie, I so know!

 

Me: I just wish I could find a farm where they let the chickens run free all day every day, and where the cows aren't hooked up to big milking machines. Then I would eat those foods again.

 

Blake: Oh my god, haven't you heard of the Healthy Butcher?

 

Me: Uh, kinda sounds like an oxymoron...

 

Blake: Oh my god, no sweetie! They have this fabuloussssss map showing all the farms in Ontario where they get their productsssss. You can visit any of them and see that the animals are well treated.

 

I think I left the salon before he finished his next sentence.  There is a Healthy Butcher literally around the corner from my house. 

 

Now, I'm not exactly super excited about paying $8 for a small brick of Cheddar, but the sheer pleasure of being able to eat cheese again and know that the cow was well-cared for - well, that makes it money well-spent in my opinion.

 

I still face obstacles because I will only eat cheese and eggs purchased from the Healthy Butcher, so meals out will still be vegan. But at least now I can bring cheese or eggs with me when I go to a friend's place for dinner - it will be my contribution, and it will make me feel good in more ways than one :)

 

**Just a side note - since eating cheese again (and in fairly minimal quantities), I have noticed a distinct change in my body. I feel more sluggish than when I was on a strictly plant-based diet. I don't think the full vegan diet has seen the end of me yet.  Maybe I just need to eat so much cheese that I feel sick...

The teacher in me gets really excited when I learn or try something new - I just want to share my experience with anyone who will listen.  Recently, I made a lifestyle change that I am really excited about - I became a vegan.  This was a personal choice, spurred by a book I read that made me heartbreakingly aware of some things that go on in the food industry - things that, deep down, we all know take place, but for whatever reason, we are willing to turn a blind eye. 

 

I had been a lacto-ovo vegetarian since I was 13, with the exception of a couple of short-lived blips where I tried to implement chicken back into my diet.  Back then, my sole reason for going vegetarian was my love of animals. My mom always told me I was the worst vegetarian ever.  Rather than turn to legumes and vegetables for the nutrients my body needed, I turned to yogurt, milk, and cheese. Large quantities of cheese.  So, even though I was eating dairy, I wasn't making healthy choices. My choices were full of fat, and relatively low in protein and other key nutrients.

 

Upon reading Skinny Bitch - a book I picked up at the Chicago airport because the table of contents had me laughing out loud - I was shocked to learn about some of the horrors faced not only by animals used for their meat, but also by dairy animals. I won't go into them here - it's easy enough to learn about if you have the inclination - but it was then and there that I decided I didn't want to have any part in it.  When I bought it, I hadn't realized the book was about veganism - amidst hilarious chapters about coffee and pop and sugar and other eating vices the authors ambush readers with some nightmarish true accounts from workers in the slaughter industry. I didn't want to know it...didn't want to read it. Life is so much easier when you don't know, or when you pretend to not know. But this damn book shone a bright light in that dark and sordid corner, and it motivated me to make big changes.

 

It's been almost 3 weeks now that I haven't consumed any animal products. It's probably a lot easier for a vegetarian to go vegan than it would be for a meat-eater as that is a LOT of change all at once. There have been a few moments where I have gazed longingly at cheese dishes, but for the most part, I have been pleasantly surprised by how easy the diet changes have become part of my regular day.  And I feel so good!

 

For the most part, people have been very supportive when they learn I am trying the vegan lifestyle. (I don't tell people unless it comes up naturally in conversation...I'm hesitant now because I don't want to end up in a debate over choices that I have made...unless, of course, the person I'm with is ready to be challenged about his/her choices in return.) Some become very curious, and I have come to expect certain questions, mainly: How do you get enough protein if you're not eating meat or dairy?and How do you get enough calcium without dairy?  Fair questions. I've now done a lot of reading on the subject, because I want to make sure I'm doing this the right way and not jeopardizing my health in the process, so I'm able to answer those questions.  For instance, did you know that all of the protein that you get from animal products actually originates from the plants they eat? I didn't know that before! Plants are absolutely loaded with protein, and unlike animal products, they have little or no fat or cholesterol, low calories, and are packed with tons of other nutrients...like iron and calcium! So much of what we depend on animal products for is found in plant-based foods, and our bodies have a much easier time digesting it because of the high fibre content.

 

Already I've gone on a lot longer than I had intended...but what can I say? I'm very passionate about this exciting change and I wish others would become more informed too. Careful - don't misinterpret - I didn't say I wish others would choose the same path. I just wish people would learn more about it...not only so they can better understand the choices of their vegan and vegetarian friends and family members, but so they can recognize that their own diet is not the be all/end all, and it's really easy to make changes that will, ultimately, improve their quality of health, extend their lifespan, prevent disease, and assist in maintaining a healthy weigh.  (And some other benefits...for non-humans :)

Home.

 

Sweet.

 

Home.

 

It is entirely surreal to me that I am writing this entry from my apartment in Toronto.  How can it be that two years have come and gone already? Wasn't it just a couple months ago that I was subjecting myself to the seemingly endless process of preparing for life in Korea?  Nope...it was a couple years ago.

 

Looking back on my time in Seoul, I have to say it was perhaps the best experience of my life. I realize I blogged numerous times about how crappy Korea was, or how lonely I was, but in terms of overall life experiences...personal education...self-discovery...there can be no denying that the past 2 years were truly incredible. (And I don't think Korea is crappy anymore...we made our peace.)

 

Anyway, I've spent the past 2 years writing about my experience of Korea, and now I have an entirely new phenomenon to ponder: the homecoming.

 

Everyone - including myself - expected that I would encounter difficulties as I settled into life in Seoul. Language barriers, a plethora of cultural differences, spicy cabbage; clearly I was in for a rough start! 

 

Conversely, everyone - not including myself - seemed to assume coming home would be easy...that I would slide right back into my niche in Toronto and pick up where I left off. Not necessarily the case, my friend.  Even though Toronto is a city I am familiar with, the homecoming is about so much more than the geography: it's about the people. In the two years I was away, I changed. My friends and family changed. Some people moved. Others got married or had babies. Priorities and schedules and social circles shifted. All of this is a natural part of life, and the changes are almost imperceptable if you are present while they are happening. But when you are removed from the situation - like, say, in Korea - it is a bit of a jolt to return to your hood and find so much has changed, and to realize that you have to start over in more ways than you expected.

 

Don't take that to mean that my homecoming has been anything less than wonderful - I have felt truly welcomed back by so many! I wake up every day with so much excitement about what the day will hold...because I am HOME. I am starting a new chapter in my life, and everything is as it should be.  (I'll always be a Seoul Sista at heart though :)

 

Currently I have 'Get Syndrome':

 

Hello, my name is Kelly, and I'm addicted to shoes.

 

My love of shoes can now only be described as 'out of control'. You may not know this, but Korea is a shoe-lover's fantasy land. Not only do they have all kinds of fun styles in every colour under the sun, but they are also super cheap. Dirt cheap. So cheap it's easy to buy so many at one time that you need to take a taxi home because your bags are so heavy and full. Of shoes. 

 

Now don't go booking a flight to Seoul...as with clothes, Korean shoes cater to smaller sizes only, so if you wear size 8 or bigger, you're out of luck. 

 

Tonight I bought a pair of funky blue slingbacks for the equivalent of $10! And a hot pair of cream stilettos for $25! My shoe collection has never looked more colourful.

 

I really have to stop though. With my flight to Toronto a mere 3 weeks away, I have to keep in mind that all of my beautiful shoes have to fit in my suitcases. If I stop now, I should be ok. But three weeks is a long time in shopping terms...that's 21 evenings of potential shoe purchases.  Somehow...someway...I have to find the strength to resist. Pray for me.

It's been quite a while since I last blogged, largely due to how busy I have been with preparations for my MOVE BACK TO CANADA!  It doesn't feel real just yet - that my 2 years in Seoul are rapidly approaching their end.  But the evidence is all around me: closets that are emptier, checklists  on my fridge, and conversations with friends that revolve around all the things we will miss about life in Korea.  My calendar is full of events dedicated to saying goodbye.

 

I have made no secret of the fact that I have struggled with loving Korea at times. It is not an easy place to love for many people, even Koreans!  But as I face my transition back to my western homeland and all of its customs and ways, I can't help but notice that I am actually really comfortable here. It took a bloody long time, but this crazy country has grown on me.

 

The energy I feel when I think about moving back home is reaching an uncontainable point - I simply ooze enthusiasm and excitement these days! While a large part of that positivity is due to my readiness to be back on familiar territory, surrounded by family and old friends, I think part of it can also be credited to the sense of accomplishment I feel for having taken on this crazy adventure.  Not only did I survive it, (which, at times, I doubted I would), but I rocked it! Korea has challenged me, and it has changed me.

 

What a chapter in my life's story this has been!

To the best of my knowledge, orphanages don't exist in Canada. Children who are given up by their birth parents are placed in foster homes until they are adopted.

 

Such is not the case in Korea.

 

The population of this relatively small country is nearing 50 million, almost half of which lives in Metro Seoul.  While Korea is in many ways a modern culture, there are still very strict views in place regarding teenage pregnancy and pregnancy without marriage.  I'm told by some Koreans that to get pregnant outside of marriage is to bring shame to the entire family.  A little melodramatic, eh?  Anyway, there must be a significant number of single women giving birth here, because there are not enough foster homes for all of the babies.  Orphanages definitely exist in Korea.  

 

Today I had the honour and the pleasure of meeting a few of the little ones given up by their single and/or young mothers.  What a reverent experience.

 

In a single-floor facility consisting of 4 rooms, there live 50 babies - all newborns, most less than 4 weeks old.  One room housed 30 healthy babies, and another room held 20 sick babies. There were 4 nurses. 

 

When I arrived, my heart was stolen by all 50 bundles, instantly and simultaneosly.  I was determined to cuddle all of them.  It didn't quite work out that way. For 3 amazing hours, I tended to the little angels. The ones who were crying were given first dibs on volunteer attention - some needed to be changed, others fed, and others stopped crying the minute they were picked up. Due to how short-staffed the orphanage is, many of the babies spend most of their time in their beds. Isn't there research that suggests babies need a lot of human contact to aid in their development?  I tell you, as soon as I had one of those tiny bodies in my arms, I was enrapt. A few short moments of burping and rocking a baby simply wouldn't do - they stayed with me until we had gotten fully acquainted. (Or, until they pooped. haha)

 

It's no secret that Asian babies are absolutely, heart-wrenchingly adorable. Even when they are all puckered and pissed-off looking from just being born. I wish I had been allowed to take pictures - I think Anne Geddes would have some steep competition.  If you visit this link - http://reikanorakuen.wordpress.com/2007/12/11/letters-from-angels-charity-exhibition-for-korean-orphans/ - you can see some Korean orphans.  Most of them are older than the ones I met today, but you get the cuteness factor just the same. Today I held a little boy who I nicknamed 'Buddha', because he had this big, round belly and a biiiig head.  If only I had brought my extra-big purse today.  I just might have tried to smuggle him home with me.

 

At the head of each baby's bed, there was a card with birth info (and the dried up umbilical cord - gross!). One thing I found both interesting and heartbreaking was to learn the amount of time between the baby's birth and when he/she was brought to the orphanage. Some babies were brought to the orphanage one or two days after being born, some two weeks, and one little guy was brought in 8 months after birth! (He was the oldest baby there and was going to be moved to another orphanage that caters to older children.) Doesn't it make you wonder - what happened to make the parents give up their child at that point? Why did it take some parents two weeks? A month? 8 months? Did the job get too hard? Did circumstances change?  According to one of the nurses, it is not uncommon for women to just drop of their baby and leave.  Apparently, one even admitted that her baby cried too much. 

 

So it's settled - I will spend every Sunday afternoon with my Korean babies. The faces will change, but the need for human contact and love won't. 

 

(PS - For anyone interested in adopting, there are thousands of Korean babies in need of homes.  If you would like info on the steps involved, let me know :)

 

13) If you see something you like while on holiday, buy it. Right away. Going back later doesn't always fit into the plan.

 

12) City life promotes aging.

 

11) Black sand is over-rated.

 

10) Keluar means exit. Not washroom.

 

9)  La Senza has 'made it' internationally.

 

8)  I have a shopping addiction. (Well, I knew that already...this trip just confirmed it.)

 

7)  I have the power to morph into Jane...as in Tarzan's totally buff and fearless girlfriend.

 

6)  Two hours in the equatorial sun without sunscreen can turn a person into a shivering, neon-pink wreck.

 

5)  Rain doesn't ruin a holiday.

 

4)  I have my father's knack for running into people I know anywhere, even in a jungle on the other side of the world.

 

3)  Sitting at the back on an airplane exponentially increases your chances of getting an entire row of seats to yourself.

 

2)  You should refrain from drinking a lot of water before a 3 hour spa treatment that involves a lot of massaging.

 

1)  It is wise to bring your bank card on holiday. (Thank God for James, is all I can say!)